I was so blessed to spend the day with some ladies that have been very special to me at various times in my life.... some friends from elementary, middle and high school came. Girls that I spent some fabulous years at MSU with were there, and of course my grandma and aunt cricket-- the ladies who raised me.
The hard work that Aunt Laura and Amanda put into that day made me feel so very loved.
One of my favorite memories from that day was reading this He Said/She Said. Seeing the differences in how Nyasha and I wrote about our relationship was hilarious to me. He was so far away on that day, I was in Michigan and he was in Harare... but reading his words was like having him right there with me!
Since many of our friends weren't able to be there with us at the shower, I thought I would share those words with you here. Tomorrow we will have been married for a year. I can't believe it... and I promise our stories are still just as different!
She
Says...
I met Nyasha in May 2009. I was stuck working in the capital
of Zimbabwe (I prefer working in the rural areas) and my friend Walter was
always pushing me to have a social life in Harare, so I let him convince me to
come to his “Africa Day” Braai (BBQ). I later found out that he wanted me to
meet his best friend, hoping we would hit it off. An hour after I arrived, Walter’s plan was
thwarted- Nyasha introduced himself and 4 hours later he left me baffled. He didn’t even ask for my phone number! But
he did invite me to go to church with him and visit an orphanage he
supported. That Sunday I took a couple
of friends with me to his church (no doubt he knew he would have no trouble
spotting me—I was the only white person there!) He only saved one seat, so we
had to sit it the balcony where it was stifling hot and he said “I’ll just see
you after”. REALLY? Ugh this man! He got
on my nerves from the very beginning, but there was something special about
him—and he’s really handsome, so I was gracious.
After church we were
making our way to the orphanage, but half of the guys from the party that week
(including Walter and the friend he wanted me to meet) were at church and they
all managed to involve themselves in our plan—and we ended up stopping for lunch
at my favorite chicken place in Harare.
So Nyasha and I had our first “date” in the middle of a table of
onlookers! We made it to the orphanage
and he was better than I hoped.
A few days later I introduced him to Ruthie, the little girl
I hoped to adopt and explained that although he hadn’t even asked me on a
proper date yet, that Ruth and I were a package deal. If he didn’t like that there was no reason to
hang around. He spent some time getting
to know her while I was away in the rural areas and when I returned to Harare
he said that he could see that she was special, and he could see that I loved
her. He said he would try to love her
too. And he did. Our entire relationship has been a battle
against differences-personal and cultural, but if we could meet on the most
important issues, faith and love, then I decided I was willing to overlook the
other things that get on my nerves, like McDonalds being his favorite thing
about America or the fact that he can sometimes be passive about things when I
am passionate about everything. I rarely
compromise on the fact that my world is decorated in pink, but I think he has
come to accept that… and I will probably let him keep his blue bath mats—Maybe.
I don’t think I even knew how lonely my Zimbabwean life was
I was until Nyasha made a place for himself in my life. I was very fulfilled and pretty content with
my life. I wasn’t looking for a partner,
I wasn’t looking to fill a hole, I actually didn’t even realize what was
missing. I always thought that eventually my time in Africa would end and I
would come home to real life and get married and settle down. I thought I would marry him almost
immediately after meeting him, but I KNEW one day when he explained his views
about Ruthie to me. We are so very
opposite, in almost every way, but somehow he is the exact size of the piece
that was missing in the puzzle of my heart.
Some days in Zim when everything goes wrong and I want to give up, I
look at Nyasha and Ruthie and I am amazed at this beautiful picture that I
never would have chosen for myself and how perfectly it fits. They are the evidence of the verse I have
clung to -Psalm 37:4 “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will grant you the
desires of your heart.” It is true, even
if I never knew what my heart truly desired.
He
Says…
I met Regina 3yrs ago and everything about this girl was
colorful, from her smile to the way she chatted her way through the people that
she met in Zimbabwe. I then later realized her favorite color is pink, she is
striking just like that colour. I am a blue guy so we were different just on
that, we are different in almost every way, I am mellow and it’s just like
“hey, I'm here”. We met at a party
hosted by Walter and a week later we got together, I thought we were going to
be alone, so I saved one seat for her at church, but she arrived with an
entourage so she sat elsewhere. The
first time we sat next to each other that day was at lunch. Somehow, I found
myself at a table with 9 people but I got to sit next to her at least. We went to Coimbra, a Portuguese restaurant
which turned out to be Regina's favorite restaurant, but mainly because of the
bread and gravy they serve, bread which she is allergic to or maybe that's just
an African excuse. I on the other hand don't really have a favorite restaurant;
I just like good tasty food or that fish burger from McDonalds which we don't
have in Zimbabwe. I would say the one thing that sticks out for me about Regina
that I love about her is how she won't budge on her beliefs; that is a special
quality. I think the one thing she loves the most about me is how allow her to
just be herself. She gets on my nerves when she gets bossy and forgets to
consider other people, but that comes along with her colourful personality, I
guess. On the other hand I can be passive and then overlook things and I
understand how that can be frustrating for her. I guess spending an entire life
with someone makes marriage a rare and exciting relationship that should be
treasured, I think that’s what I would say I am looking forward to, a whole
life. I think for Regina she’s looking
forward to sharing life and of course having sex all the time. I just feel blessed that God brought her all
the way from America just for me. We are opposites in almost everything but we
just match.
Oh I almost forgot, before I even asked her out on a date,
she took me to this small orphanage I had never heard of, and I have lived in
Harare my whole life. I don’t know how she finds these places. She introduced me to this small little girl,
Ruth, and told me that if I wasn’t willing to adopt her and love her like my
own child, then I might as well forget about asking her out. Regina is very forward, and although many men
in Zimbabwe would want to date her, I am not sure that many would want to bring
Ruthie home. But something happened when
I started spending time with Ru. I could see how much Regina loves her. Regina is a therapist so she has explanations
for this, but Ru can’t love back yet.
She is 9 and I see Regina’s heart break some days with this little girl.
No one in the world can understand this and it only makes sense when you see
it, but these two belong together.
Ruthie has spent her life in a grey place and pink is her favorite
color. She has never had a choice about
anything and yet she is as stubborn as a donkey about the things she
wants. Shoes are her favorite thing. Every
doctor she’s met has said that she will die and yet this girl is a fighter and
she proves them all wrong every day.
Regina and Ruthie have taught me so much about God’s love. To love one without the other doesn’t make
sense. My country doesn’t understand adoption, but Regina gives her life to
change that. Some might say I was her
first convert-but not her last.
So there you have it.... Nyasha basically wrote for my gma to read that the main reason I wanted to get married was to have sex. Oh for the LOVE!!!!
With love from Zimbabwe,
Gigi
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| Amanda, Aunt Laura and me |
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| Aunt Cricket, me and Gma! |
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