Baby Chari: The Big Questions

Friends,

I know that our pregnancy announcement has surprised (and excited) many of you and given lots of questions, so I will do my best to answer them all!

Q:  Is Baby Chari a boy or a girl?

A: Baby is one of those! God and our doctor know which one, but we have decided to wait until we are in the delivery room to find out.  Those of you who know us can guess who made this decision (hint, hint: it was not the impatient mommy!)  Nyasha really wants to experience this surprise and I want to give that to him—but I won’t lie, at every doctor appointment I pray that someone will slip and say “he or she” hahahaha

Your guess is as good as ours.  I think Baby is a boy, but we will know soon enough!

Q:  Will we remain in Zimbabwe on the mission field with the baby?

A: Absolutely.  I was certain of my call to Zimbabwe before I met Nyasha, long before we married and even more so now that we are serving God together.  I was worried about how this would work out in terms of my ability to serve, but when the people I work with learned of my pregnancy they were thrilled and feel that this experience just continues to validate my voice in the context in which I work.  I, like many women in Zimbabwe will strap baby to my back and get on with my work… I am sure that our caregiver training groups will be more exciting with a real baby as opposed to a therapy doll! I anticipate that they will also be slightly noisier as well!  (Baby wearing mamas I’d love your opinions on wraps and carriers!)

Q: How does Ru feel about being a big sister?

A: This was our biggest concern regarding the early timing of this baby; however I have to say that I was surprised at how excited she has been!  Nyasha’s brother and sister in law had their third baby last December and Ru was enchanted by Tina from the beginning.  She loves having a baby cousin and at that point instructed us that “We could have a baby anytime” but that she would prefer twins!  We knew that our baby would be a slightly different story and that there would be lots of emotions… and there have been.  She is so excited—and our doctor has been so great with her! He let her come into one appointment and see the baby on the ultrasound.  Her face lit up when she heard the heartbeat and she couldn’t take her eyes off the screen.  The baby didn’t disappoint, he or she turned its little head and looked straight ahead and scratched its head! Ru was amazed and the doctor printed a picture that she has been carrying around ever since! She is convinced that baby is a little girl and she has already begun creating a duty roster that will allow her to hold the baby the most.  But she told us not to worry, that we will be able to hold Lucy (the dog who thinks she is a baby!)  

This does not mean that this transition will be easy.  We know that there are moments where she wonders about her history, the time she was in the womb and most importantly her birth mother.  We know that seeing this baby have experiences that she did not have will bring up more that we need to work on, but she also knows that we are in this together.  This little girl has our whole hearts and she knows that we are not afraid of the ways in which these transitions stretch us as a family. 

This was Ru when she found out she was going to be a big sister.  The preciousness in this photo is just too much.

Q: Will the baby be a citizen of the USA?

A: Yes.  Thank you for being concerned about these details!  The baby will be a citizen of the USA based on my citizenship.  At this time dual citizenship is not allowed between the USA and Zimbabwe, so we have to choose one.  For many reasons, we have made the choice for baby to be a US citizen.

Q:  Will we have baby in Zimbabwe or the USA?

A:  This is another million dollar question.  Although there are reasons that we would choose to have the baby in both places (mainly because we have so many people we love in both places) we have decided that if all goes according to plan, baby will be born early February in Michigan.  My family is there and they have so graciously allowed us to experience so much that they missed out on (including our wedding) that we really want to be able to be with them when baby is born.  

At this point it looks like I will travel over at the end of November.  I will spend Thanksgiving in California (my first American Thanksgiving in 10 years!!!!!!!) And Nyasha will travel over at Christmas time (his first American Christmas EVER!!!)   Nyasha will stay with us until he needs to get back to work and as soon as the doctors say we are good to go, baby and I will head back to Zimbabwe.

Q: What do we need/how can you help?

A: I am completely overwhelmed by the idea of creating a list of necessary baby things! It’s madness!  However I do know that there are some things that we need to borrow and some that we need to bring back with us.  Here is what we know we need so far:

 

•   A place to stay in Michigan (preferably a house-sitting gig for some snow-birds for Jan and Feb)
• A car to borrow in Michigan (Anytime from early December on)
• Maternity clothes (for winter, Michigan is COLD!!)
•  Various baby stuff…. This will be a post for another day!
•   Flights (if anyone has any air miles that they would like to share with us, we would appreciate it!)

Q: How can we pray for you?

A: This has been a tough pregnancy.  I have been quite ill, catching pretty much anything that comes my way—from stomach bugs to conjunctivitis! Please just pray that baby and I will remain healthy and that our travel is uneventful! Pray for peace for Nyasha as he prepares to take time off to be with us in the USA when the baby comes.  Please pray that Ru continues to be excited as she is promoted to Big Sister and that she openly explore all of her emotions during this time.  Pray that God continue to provide for all of our needs, as He most certainly has so far!  Our big prayer is that this transition of welcoming a new baby home is as enjoyable as our transition into marriage was, we have laughed and connected so well and we hope this continues as we add a new transition to our list of life experiences.  We appreciate your prayers and love so very much! 

My thoughts about packing::

When I was a little girl and my grandparents would pull out my little suitcase and tell me we were going somewhere fabulous- it was ALWAYS somewhere fabulous, I would immediately start to pack, EVERYTHING.

Even as a child I was an overpacker, if I was going somewhere for the day, I would stuff as many things into my little girl purse as possible and still feel nervous that I wouldn’t have what I needed when I got there.
In my early 20’s I accepted the fact that I would always be an over-packer.  If I was on a trip with a group, I would always have the most luggage.  It was ok, I was comfortable that way.

The first few times I packed for trips to Zimbabwe were a nightmare.  “3 suitcases of 70 pounds?? I will be gone a year!!!” Some of you were gracious enough to help me pack those bags. You witnessed my dilemma, what I wanted to take vs what was reasonable to take.  What supplies were needed vs how much shampoo I thought would get me through!

Every year when I travel to Zim after visiting the States, I cry when it’s time to pack.  I used to cry because I couldn't fit everything and I couldn’t imagine living without anything!

Today I am 31 and when I travel to Zimbabwe I get a luggage allowance of 2 bags of 50 pounds each thanks to high fuel prices!  I have more people to buy gifts for than ever and I know more projects and more of their needs than ever before.

I have to understand that I cannot fit everything into 100 pounds.

“He who would travel happily must travel light.” – Antoine de Saint Exupéry

Today I am packing to travel to Michigan for a week to visit my grandma and family. It is mother’s day and my grandma’s birthday and it has been ages since I have been able to look in the eyes of the women who raised me and tell them I love them on this day. I do not take their sacrifices for granted.

I am also packing my bags for Zimbabwe, with the hope that after this week with them I will be getting back to my work!

Yesterday the doctor wrote a letter releasing me back to work after all of my medical treatments I wanted to dance my way out of Nashville General Hospital!

But today I am faced with the reality of packing.  My tears today are not about putting stuff in a suitcase, I feel blessed to even have stuff and a case to put it in. I feel more blessed to have a journey. My tears are about the comings and the goings.  You see,  in order for me to go to Zimbabwe, I must leave the US.  That has always been the problem… leaving behind the people who make my life special.

When people ask me about what my daily life looks like in Zimbabwe, they get sad when I tell them about the work that I do, they often say, “That must be so hard”.  Yes it is, but what is harder is at the end of the day I come home to someone else’s family.  I celebrate the birthdays of the relatives of others.  I attend weddings of other people’s cousins.  I am so grateful to the people in Zimbabwe that have made me a part of their family.  There are too many to list.  No matter how much I love them, I am still missing my own family.

I am blessed to have so many families and so many places that make me feel at home.  The challenge comes in only being able to be in one place at a time… it means that I am always missing someone, somewhere.

Today is my last day in Nashville for a while.  For those special people who have made me at home here, who have made me a part of their family, I will be eternally grateful.  Nearly 3 months of medical care would been far more difficult without my best friend Natalie and her family and the dear people of Bluegrass Baptist Church.

My tears while packing today are not about shirts and shoes… even if it may look that way.  Today my tears are about you.  I will miss you.

NRB

Each year a group of volunteers from ROCK of Africa head to Nashville for the National Religious Broadcasters convention.  This is always an important time to spend with other Christians, learning about how God is moving in the world and being encouraged! It is also a time of long days, longer nights and not very much sleep.

One of the highlights of the convention each year is Kay Arthur.  She is often found speaking at either Women in Christian Media, or NRB...this year she did both--BIGGER BLESSING!

I met so many amazing people this year and heard so many great things, however I was most blessed by a talk at Women in Christian Media in which Kay Arthur, Vonnette Bright and Thelma Wells shared insight into their ministry--and gave lots of advice on marriage!  What priceless wisdom to be able to behold from these godly women!

I have also decided, with the encouragement of several people that I met at NRB, and so many others over the years, to begin writing a book.  I had been collecting stories from my experience in Zimbabwe, but when my laptop and all of my data was stolen, I was discouraged and kind of gave up.  I have a renewed sense of purpose after this convention and made a commitment to a woman I am respect very much, to write a chapter a month.  So here we go... someday ROCK of Africa volunteers might see my book on display at NRB!  If my story can be an inspiration be an inspiration to someone--or more importantly to bring glory to God, then how can I not tell it?

They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death. Revelation 12:11

Saying good-bye

It's never easy. I imagined that the more practice I have in saying good-bye, the better I should become at it. However, leaving Zimbabwe today is harder than it ever has been before, however when I went to say good-bye to the chidren at a local orphanage that I spend a lot of time at, I found that bringing bubbles made saying good-bye so much easier!

I love Zimbabwe, and although I will be faraway for a little while, I hold her people in my heart.